Lifestyle

StreetWars

Assassins have a way of altering history: Gavrilo Princip's killing of Archduke Ferdinand kick-started WWI, while Antonio Banderas' killing of those Dutch dudes in Assassins kick-started nothing. What happened to you, Antonio Banderas? Now altering your history of boredom, StreetWars.

Started in NYC before taking LA/Paris/London by storm, SW's a highly organized, no-holds-barred tournament of mock-murder, which'll soon transform the streets of SF into a battleground for you and 199 other "watergun assassins"; stalk one another with Super Soakers, water balloons, improvised water weapons, etc., 'til there's only one man-idiot left standing, who'll be handed 500 bucks and probably a pink slip. How it works: each participant's given his target (head shot and pertinent deets) by SW's founders, Mustache Commander and Supreme Commander (obvi), who he must track down and blast before being moistened himself; each time a kill's made, the victim hands his assignment over to his slayer, and so on, with the only safe zones being the square block around where you work, bus stops, and bars, making The Bus Stop doubly safe, assuming you don't disrespect the Colorado Buffs. This installment of SW's different from any other in that all the action's tracked on the website, via self-appointed agent names and avatars, so anyone can stop by to see who's dead/how it happened, who's the kill leader, aka, the guy who thought ahead and already got his pink slip.

If the shooter with the most kills doesn't survive, he's still a winner 'cause he gets a gilded/framed water gun and "a sh*t load of booze" -- an honor, sure, but brag about it to the ladies and you'll only look desperado.