Your school lunch is back, with love from Mom
You didn't appreciate them back then, but the lunch your mom packed for you in school was awesome, or at least that's what that bigger kid would say after beating you up, eating it in front of you, and telling everybody he'd really love to have sex with your mom. The bullying may be over (or is it?!?), but the food is back, at Sack Lunch Co.
Propped up inside a large green kiosk in front of Rosa's Pizza, Sack is nostalgizing your midday meal with $5 brown bag lunches filled with sammies, snacks, and encouraging notes from "Mom", or actually, a CFA whose wife started making lunch for him because he'd been working without eating -- somewhere, Louie Anderson just read this, cried, and ate his computer for catharsis.
Sandos're made fresh every morning on toasted white bread, with beautifully simple choices like PB&J, turkey/cheese, BLT, and roast beef, and come with canned sodas or CapriSun, plus two sides (potato salad, chips, yogurt...), plus a dessert including Rice Krispy Treats, Fruit Roll-Ups, and even Airheads...whoa, where're the Dunkaroos, Mom? I didn't go to the grocery store to watch you price-compare laundry detergent!
The printed notes feature fortune cookie-ish Mom-isms like "Remember to wash your hands before & after you eat", "If you swallow a watermelon seed it will grow inside your stomach!", and "Did you remember to put on clean underwear? Love, Mom", proving these lunches care about your sack, too.
They even sell $20 novelty lunch boxes (with lunch inside) printed with Batman, Superman, Elmo, etc., plus school supplies like pencils, notebooks, and even Scantron sheets, to remind you that getting lunches swiped and having terrifying things said about your mother weren't the only way you were constantly tested in middle school.