Never leave home again

A pair of former Maudie's and Hopdoddy bartenders are now enabling alcohol-induced laziness with Couch Potato Austin, which'll deliver just about anything you'd find in a convenience store to over 12 zip codes via Smart car, all in less than 30min. Your assumption that the best customers would be either fat with child or rolling fat ones could be right, since the most popular items are ice cream (Blue Bell, Nestle, B & J's) and microwave burritos (7-Eleven's Bomb or the Spicy Red Hot Beef & Bean Gigante). There're also local delicacies (Austinuts, Buddha's Brew Kombucha), medicine, 35 types of chips, and munchies from cheese wedges to White Castle burgers. Meanwhile, partying reinforcements come via Beirut supplies (Solo cups, ping pong balls), Poor Boy's Beer (Lonestar, PBR, Keystone...), fancier locals like Real Ale and Hops & Grain, seven styles of wine plus one style-less variety (Franzia!), and tobacco products ranging from Marlboro Reds to Phillie Blunts, far more faithful to their inspiration than the poorly selling brand Philly Loquaciouses. For those with less microwavable tastes, they've teamed with Taco Deli to offer both breakfast and lunch tacos -- take advantage of that too much, and without leaving the couch you'll cover the same zip codes as Potato.