Parlour technically means "speaking place", but this white-tiled, varnished-wood Kensal Green spot has fatter intentions for your tongue: occupying it with Brit-chow & a healthy booze selection from the boys behind Notting Hill's Mall Tavern. The plentiful offerings range from AM thick-cut bacon & egg sarnies w/ Oxford sauce, to PM slow-cooked rump steak w/ "sma-ash" (smoked -- not instant -- mashed pots), and braised beef shin stuffed into a suet pasty crust to make their Dandiest dish, a gigantic Cow Pie. Following all that, you'll find PB&J ice cream sandwiches, and toasted wagon wheels that'll force them to roll you and your nostalgia out of the place. Where the place truly excels however, is at the bar, where a trio of (imminent) wine taps pour house red/ white/ pink, while 10 more see crafts like Budvar Black Lager, Hackney Hopstar, and Camden Ink Stout (off tap there's a whole "Beeropedia" of Kernels, Brooklyns, and Mauis). Meanwhile, cocktails are ruled by the 5Alive & tequila Vicky & Bert's Wedding Punch, a royal union that'll put you anywhere but a speaking place.