Because judging others leads to being judged yourself (Old Bailey, two out of five stars, terrible accommodations. Take that, Old Bailey!), come Monday, you'll get that chance to form your own opinions of MasterChef judge/dessert-dominator Gregg Wallace, who’s cutting the ribbon on his nostalgic-menu-driven resto, whose hanging lamps, booth seating, and long glass wall are settled into the Bermondsey Square Hotel -- which, despite the name, cool people are allowed into as well.
The menu’s revived/tweaked all manner of '70s staples from Wallace’s youth, starting with avocado prawn that adds a crazily unbreaded scampi & shellfish dressing, then moving on to huge vol-au-vents stuffed w/ wild 'shrooms & cep veloute, and a mulligatawny soup loaded with onion bhaji and flaked chicken (sadly not 99p).
The classics get bigger with a whole glazed Lobster Thermidor, a chargrilled Dexter T-bone covered in green peppercorn sauce, citrus-cured cod fish fingers w/ crushed marrowfat peas, and chicken Kiev sided by Savoy cabbage -- in typical fashion, it somehow has room for the Duchess... potatoes.
Assuming he didn’t eat them all while you were reading this, Wallace's desserts will involve Knickerbocker Glory, fruit crumble & custard, a chocolate brownie, a banana split, and his own version of Angel Delight, which will find its own accommodations in your Old Belly.