'Cause you're hungry like one

Since the last time you cooked 10 courses was when you masterminded that college cheating scandal, impress family, friends, and frenemies instead by turning to Wolf Cuisine, who'll deliver to your home fancified 10-course dinners from a chef that trained at Le Cordon Bleu, which is much more impressive than just watching the dean of Le Gordon Bleu turn red.

The first dinners are just available to order now for delivery the week of Oct 6th, and include dishes like green lip mussels with uni, avocado, and red onion; scallop w/ foie gras and cauliflower; and a parsnip/ enoki/ fennel-enhanced halibut that's butter-poached, also a complicated illegal hunting technique that involves drawing animals into traps with tubs of Country Crock. And just when you think you're full, they'll ply you with oysters avec lime panna cotta, mignonette, and tobiko; a dry-aged rib eye w/ asparagus and tomatoes; and a blood orange/ basil "Frozen Salad", which definitely sounds like a sexy move you shouldn't Google.

The whole bit comes with instructions on any prep you have to do (simple stuff like saucing proteins), as well as instructional videos on YouTube, which you'll clearly watch to make sure it's corre... holy crap, is that a clip of Gordon throwing trout at his sous chef!? Oh, the horror!!