Populence v. Pop Karma: The tale of the tape

[As narrated by a very hungry Jim Lampley] Long has the title of non-movie-related Popcorn Champion been vacant, but today, two spunky contenders who've toiled and trained and developed all the locally sourced organic tricks of the trade are prepared to battle for the crown

Annnnd now, in near corner, weighing in at at least as much as several cars, or one Mike Tyson, and able to pop up to 80lbs of piping delicious corn per hour, we have the health-consciously lean, mean, popping machine: Pop Karma!! And in far corner, making its way in to funky jazz while wearing sleek fleur-de-lis-adorned robes, the Best of the West (Village): Populence!!

TALE OF THE TAPE (note: all stats tallied by CompuPop):

Story: With both coming from humble beginnings and harboring hopes of popcorn dominance, PK Kickstartered its way to top contendership thanks to a former Bar Boulud chef helping train its flavors to the top. Populence, meanwhile, comes from the Mayweather family's popcorn equivalent: the owner's father proposed to his wife using a box of Cracker Jack, she somehow said yes, and Populence's fate was determined

Corn: Both utilizing locally sourced and organic kernels, the flavors are where this war will be decided. Populence will come out swinging with a rotating selection including jalapeno cheddar, ginger caramel, and garlic rosemary, while PK's got three go-to punches, including the olive oil-sauced Mediterranean and Zen Cheddar, plus three more they'll trot out for you to spar with seasonally

Extras: Each contender has a little something up their sleeve: for PK it's Chai energy bars and "human grade" dog treats, while Populence is expected to counterpunch with ginger beer and boxes of candy

The Decision: Too close to call! Though, Larry Merchant just ate them all while simultaneously talking for six hours straight, so he's clearly into them. Take your own shot at both and weigh in to let the world know.