Opening today with its very first West Coast location in the heart of Portland's Pearl, Mellow Mushroom is a pizza joint rocking cult-favorite pies pairable with 100 brews in a George Jetson-esque man-cave complete with an "artful semi-hippie vibe", because nothing says pizza like an 18-wheeler full of bongos and goo balls. You’ll need plenty of: Pizza: Mellow hand-tosses and stone-bakes a spring water mixed molasses dough, then tops it with awesome like the House Special's pepperoni/ sausage/ ground beef/ ham/ Applewood-smoked bacon; the olive oil/ garlic-based Caesar with pesto chicken, three cheeses, and a post-oven Caesar salad perched on top; and a pesto crust/ sauce jam seated with portobello and button 'shrooms, spinach, feta, and jalapeno, dubbed the Magical Mystery Tour, likely because eating a whole one will cause people to call you the walrus. Beer: Because it’s so tough to strong-arm people into drinking these days, Mellow offers a beer club that nets you a coozy (huzzah!) after sipping 28 different brews, a $25 gift card after 50, and a name-engraved mug after 100 that'll get you four additional ounces at no extra charge. Which basically means, get over there now and tackle a roster including three from Double Mountain, Burnside Brewing's Oatmeal Pale, and Southern Oregon's Na Zdravi Pils, plus heavy-hitters like a 9% ABV Old Rasputin beside a nitro'd Alameda Black Bear XX, because the XXX version is just too racy to tap. If you’re not down with pizza, you should really seek professional help, but until then Mellow's menu has plenty more to offer, including a steak & cheese hoagie and stuffed portobello mushrooms, not to be confused with ones that keep those hippie truckers so mellow despite the cacophony of untrained percussionists doin' work.