Kids think grown-ups have all the fun: they get to drive, and stay up late, and can get away with making a lazy, crappy movie despite A-listers like Rob Schneider. Well, now a former wine bar owner is delivering more childish enjoyment than David Spade could ever handle, at Fizz.
From the one-time owner of an economy-killed SE PDX wine bar, Fizz is luring sugar seekers into a wildly colored playground, where a bursting Sputnik lamp, red-couched lounge area, and sweeping soda counter set the scene for saccharine shenanigans like old-timey fountain drinks, 200+ bottled sodas, and ~300 kinds of odd and hard-to-find candies, at least one of which has gotta do the trick for Bow Wow Wow. Some of said weirdness: not-quite-PC candy cigarettes complete with glowing tip and powdered sugar smoke, bulk oddities like intense double-salted licorice, and quaffables that include Judge Wapner Cola and freakish dare-worthy sodas, like one flavored like hot wings, even though Linda McCartney was really only like a 6.5. For those looking to buy their best girl a malted, Fizz's soda counter rocks a roster of olden-day awesome, like egg creams (built from bubbled-up milk and East Coast standard Fox's U-bet chocolate), four-scoop 16oz shakes, and sodas in flavors such as Butter Beer, or what Val Kilmer calls “really not as refreshing as Rendered Fat Beer”.
For people who've been too intimidated by their strongarm dentist to consider chowing on the sweets, Fizz also plans to offer savory hand pies stuffed with ingredients like potato, kale, and Italian sausage, which also happened to be the sub-subtitle for Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo.