Mobile meat-slingers hit the streets

Failing a loan approval doesn't have to be a bad thing: think about all the exercise you'll get from a bike instead of that car, or running up the basement stairs to scream at your idiot mom, who left the crusts on your sandwich, again. Now a loan rejection is leading to even better food, via Raney Brothers BBQ.

Conceived by a food industry vet and his bro when they couldn't score the loan needed for a full restaurant (despite excellent credit!), this porcine-arted truck's serving dry-rubbed meats they've smoked for up to 15hrs, a process that impresses absolutely no one attending this weekend's Hempfest. The all-meat sandwich lineup includes:

Pulled Pork: Topped w/ BBQ sauce and red cabbage slaw, their signature fist-meal boasts pig that's cherry wood-smoked, and flavored for 24hrs with a blend of spices concocted by "Uncle Pauly", so Shore-ly it's awesome.

Pork Salad: Served on a potato roll, this guy's blended w/ celery, onion, and a flavorful "spice mayo", aka the nickname given to OJ when he took a job "acting" during the lockout.

Cajun Grinder: Topped w/ marinara sauce, cheese & grilled onions, this rustic sammie's highlighted by a slice of "Kickin' Meatloaf", which'll totally Fight Club (sandwiches) all day, son!

Because a sandwich alone does not a meal make, they've also got sides like a mean potato salad, and an apple/ pineapple-flavored Sweet Mac, which your idiot mom was supposed to buy you, but then came home with a crappy, brand-new Dell. Ughh.