Is your high-level job not challenging you enough? Are you a sadomasochist with $3,000 burning a hole through your William Fioravanti suit? Then boy, do we have something special for you.
Fashioned from old airplane propellers, the Executive Finger Pincher from MotoArt rotates at an unexciting 4 rpm and dares you to stick your finger in between the spinning gears, lest you suffer a mildly annoying pinch.
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If your reflexes are sluggish and you happen to receive a pinch, the motor will automatically reverse to give you another shot. And if you’re worried about it breaking, don’t be, the whole contraption's nickel plated and weighs a lumbering 40 lbs. That's right, 40 lbs. They only constructed 25, so be sure to act fast—these will probably sell out by 2020.
Alex Robinson is a senior editor at Supercompressor. He'll pinch your finger for $1,950. Make an appointment with him on Twitter @ItsAlexRobinson.