Considering how much of our lives we spend chained to a desk, it's wise to keep it stocked with everything you need to transition seamlessly from a long day at the office to a perhaps even longer (and God willing, more enjoyable) night on the town.
To make it easier, we've rounded up the 12 things every man should keep stashed in his desk or office. Pay attention, guys.
Price: $5 max each; free if you take 'em from the dentist, which you should do.
Why: That Tinder date in two hours will not be impressed with that onion artichoke you just wolfed down.
Why: Big late-afternoon meeting? It's worth hitting the bathroom mirror to tame your wild mane and make the best impression.
Price: You should be out of the store in under $5.
Why: Lunch; plus, gross breath, man.
Why: Nothing jolts you awake like a strong cup of coffee and a dash of Rohtos to the eye. These Japanese eye drops are no joke; they sting quite a bit at first, but then they make your eyes feel AMAZING, and whiten them at the same time. Win-win.
Price: $5 at most.
Why: Pesky cat hairs and sweater pilling be damned. This will keep your dark suits and pants looking fresh no matter how long you've been slouched making spreadsheets.
Why: In the age of the open office, it's important to find successful ways to avoid distractions and noisy co-workers. For the situations you can't escape by temporary relocating, whip out a pair of comfy 'phones and blast yourself into the zone with a special playlist.
Why: For those long, sweaty summer days it's a good idea to keep a stick of deodorant on call when things get ripe. Also not a bad idea to reapply when headed out on that Tinder date.
Why: If you don't have the room (or the authority) to keep a proper bar set up, it's a good idea to have a bottle tucked away for special celebrations, or taking the edge off at the end of a stressful day. Our pick? Casamigos Tequila of course.
Why: Yep, you went out waaaaaaay too late last night, but you can't afford to appear as such during that 8 a.m. meeting. Roll some of this magic stuff on under your eyes and you're golden. Not only does it give your face a cool rush that forces you to feel awake, but it reduces the puffiness and dark circles that give away just how exhausted you are.
Price: $26 (or much cheaper if you follow the below link.)
Why: When your after hours plans call for something (or someone) special, dap a little cologne to get in the groove. Just be careful to select a scent that doesn't remind people of their awkward teenage years, and for God's sake, apply conservatively.
Joe McGauley is a senior editor at Supercompressor. He may or may not have an unhealthy dependence on Rohtos.