These Aren't Your Eye Doctor's Roll-up Sunglasses

Most of your experiences with roll-up sunglasses have not gone well—each one has come as a weird sort of party favor after your doctor put drops in your eyes that made them painfully drunk on light. Though they might not win any endorsements from the world’s fashionable people, SportEYZ roll-up sunglasses sidestep those problems, resulting in a compelling case for roll-ups as emergency shades to stash just in case. 

As your backups (or backup-backups), SportEYZ has some distinct advantages. Since they deploy from a floating case the size of a film can—smaller than foldable sunglasses—you really have no excuse not to have them stashed in every room of your house, your car, and your a movie hit man’s gun collection.

Accidental or not, the SportEYZ shape takes inspiration from the venerable Oakley M-Frame, that iconic bit of eyewear that has been the go-to for SWAT teams and Tour de France ex-champions. To boot: the SportEYZ retention system improves on the ghastly ophthalmologist-approved, claw-in-skin method, using a simple drawstring that provides goggle-like security. And if that security were to fail in the struggle against your high-octane lifestyle? Well, you're in luck, Johnny Utah, you can buy another one. It takes around 10 SportEYZ to equal the price of a pair of Wayfarers.

Ethan Mann is an editor at Supercompressor. He is terrified of the eye doctor because that machine looks like that Clockwork Orange prop. Hear more phobias on his Twitter @ewolffmann.