You know what? F*ck it. You don't have to climb a damn mountain just to prove a point—you don't have to do anything you don't want to do...that's what mother always told you.
You're your own person and you have a big juicy brain filled with good ideas and you will wear a shirt covered in little sh*ts. At the end of the day, the Poo Emoji Button-Up Shirt is a bold shout akin to Captain Kirk's Khan scream that will force your friends and peers to lance palms with high-fives.
If you don't like it, I will personally refund you out of my own pocket—but you'll have to catch me first.
Jeremy Glass is the Vice editor for Supercompressor and has seen Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan many times.