Some biblical dude, possibly God, once suggested beating swords into plowshares, but everyone knows that plowshares are notoriously sucky at keeping your cellphone out of your stank gym clothes. For war goods adapted to bag-y use, check out Killspencer.

Just launched and crafting manbags made at least partially from military-issued material, Killspencer's named after Art Center-hallway graffiti targeting its founder with that same message, which he decided was cool after getting over the initial shock, and not getting killed. All sacks're blessed with Special Ops-grade hardware (i.e., skydive-ready buckles, straps made from webbing that can support 2+ tons), and're available in three impressively diesel fabrications: "Repurposed" (actual battle-worn truck tarp), "Historical Reserve" (deadstock tent/transport canvas from Korea/Vietnam), and "Classic", in lightweight waterproof/flame-resistant black nylon, or waterproof white tarpaulin -- never officially used in combat, but it totally aced the demanding Super Soaker trials. Each fabrication's applied to three bag shapes: a small, curved-top backpack w/ foam-padded back & interior camera/iPod/pen stashes; a mid-sized weekend duffel w/ two slim side pockets and handles on the top and sides; and a messenger w/ a thick strap that stashes to transform it into a briefcase, in case you decide to present your business plan to the guy you're delivering a package to.

Each piece is individually numbered, and all include multiple reinforced attachment points for expansion via Alice Clips -- which, despite securing pouches and canteens, are notoriously sucky at conveying military-grade man-ness.