Is silent really deadlier?
"No," says Dr. Sharma. "Silent or loud, they have the same constituents in terms of gases like nitrogen, hydrogen, methane, oxygen, and water." Water? Eww. This is venturing into shart territory.
Why are some farts loud and some farts quiet?
"Loudness vs. silence is determined by volume of gas, velocity of expulsion, and resistance felt by the expelled gases at the anal sphincter/tissue around the anus/butt cheeks," Dr. Sharma says.
I'd also argue that farts are sentient beings that can sense whether you're in a loud place like an airplane, or a quiet place like a library or yoga class, and roar louder than Katy Perry if it's the latter.
Are there really specks of poop within farts?
"Yes," Dr. Sharma says. "Since there's no way to determine how much and what type of stool (solid or liquid) sits in the various colon segments, it's safe to assume that there will be poop specks in farts. If you're constipated or have diarrhea, expect more flecks."
I don't know about you, but I have never been more grateful that wearing underpants, jeans, Spanx, and other garments to cover the lower half is a social norm.