To the gym-goers, pavement pounders, and muscle-bound weight freaks of the world: I applaud you. Your commitment to your own health sets you apart as a uniquely masochistic element of society, unafraid of making caricatures of yourselves as you sweat, grunt, and contort your way to new levels of physical prowess.
But to outsiders looking in, you're a strange bunch. What, exactly, motivates such painful behavior, and why, exactly, are you picking up heavy things just to put them back down?
While the answers aren't always clear, there are ways to identify certain elements of this strange, exercise-drugged society. And perhaps, if you can identify the parts, you'll be able to better understand the whole.
The Pack of CrossFit Bros
Be wary of the CrossFit bro. These dudes are strong -- they like the particularly grueling practice of jumping on tall boxes and throwing down weights. They're also excessively defensive of their chosen sport. This can be a dangerous combination. Avoid joking about the Paleo diet, CrossFit injuries or, well, anything in their presence. If they think you've crossed them, they'll join up with other CrossFit bros to hunt you down and attack you like a pack of wolves.