The skin discoloration associated with laptop-to-skin contact is similar to what one would suffer from resting their legs on a space heater, or getting too close to an actual fire. While Korman promises it’s an “uncommon phenomenon,” and not life threatening, the discoloration that does happen is permanent. Meaning it’s for-ev-er.
Additionally, patchy, red legs might make future hookups a little awkward, and could lead to some frantic Googling on your partner’s part.
Speaking of hookups...
Will a laptop fry my fertility?
Unfortunately, it might.
While the health risks of sitting with a laptop on your lap are poorly defined, we do know that wearing tight pants or briefs may cause a man to have a lower concentration of motile sperm (er, successful swimmers) in their joose, and driving a car for more than two hours a day can compromise sperm quality, says Allan Pacey, the head of Andrology for Sheffield Teaching Hospitals, where he’s in charge of the sperm banking service.
One reason for this is that they increase heat to the scrotum, which can damage your sperm. And since studies have found a direct correlation between laptop use and increased scrotal temperature, Pacey thinks laptops are pretty bad for your balls.