It's nearly impossible to take home the calm beauty of the woods, and even if you do figure out a way, most reports indicate that he's actually quite aggressive when he gets there. Take home a less risky piece of exquisite forestry, with the woodwork of Jason Tennant.
Living, working, and finding inspiration in a secluded cabin in NY's Finger Lake region, Tennant hand-carves remarkably detailed animal motifs (from purely domestic collected wood) in "celebration of nature's resilience to human stresses", though what bird carvings have to do with Rick Flair's high tolerance for choke slams isn't completely clear. Winged-whittlings include the spruce "Silent Flight", an upright owl with glass eyes and a 3ft wingspan; the hemlock, mid-flight "Surveying Hawk" painted to "mimic patterns in plumage"; or a set of five finely sanded, individually posed black crows, each about a foot long, which a newly divorced Chris Robinson keeps insisting is what makes him so Hard to Handle. Non-avian work includes the hemlock "Grinning Coyote" with a wickedly toothy smile, the not-actually wearable "Snarling Wolf Mask" with hand-formed epoxy teeth, and a humanoid number rocking finely textured antlers, crafted from red oak/black cherry, and explained as an "appropriation of the European Greenman" -- unlike the Philadelphian Green Man, for whom wood is an embarrassing disaster.
Because not everything is about faithfully whittling nature's likeness, Tennant's also got a series of more abstract winged pieces dubbed "Nike Of The Forest", which shows how desperate the sneaker company really is, as Whitaker's handicap is like a +16.