Even without trying to capture absolute realism, needlepoint is exasperating enough -- just look at how the stress has turned your grandma into a shriveled, spiteful old woman. Risking becoming even more old and shriveled: Daniel Kornrumpf Portraits.
Elevating needlepoint to a mind-blowing stratum, this Mt. Ida & Newbury College design prof (who lives in beautiful Berkley, MA) painstakingly hand-stitches eye-catchingly textured, embroidered portraits of mostly young and hip-looking peeps, an endeavor originally inspired by looking at his friends' MySpace profile pics, which explains why, like, half of them have frosted tips and puka shell necklaces. Choice pieces include Focal Plane with a scruffed hipster apparently coming from having his eyes dilated; one in which you can read the words "Austin Texas" across a redhead's mirrored shades; and an orally bejeweled chick smiling broadly whilst flashing the peace sign in "Diamonds on my neck. Diamonds on my grill", probably marking the first time Kelis has ever been involved with sewing. She's bossy! If you're not super into Kelis/random people, send Daniel a photo of yourself, and he'll work you up a custom job -- just be aware that the stitching takes four to six months, as he's got to fill in a large linen canvas with an intricate, three-layer weave, which you better not call out Kelis on, cause again, the bossiness.
Because too much needlepoint makes Danny a dull boy, he's also got a selection of more traditional portraits done in everything from oils to colored pencils, which is also how your grandma would describe them, but she's not really a bigot -- really it's just the needlepoint talking.
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