Put a horse on your lawn

Nothing says you've made it like a sculpture in your yard -- then again, nothing says "Amber Alert" like a peeing cherub. Offering something grander: Julia Jitkoff.

Based near Corpus, Jitkoff's bronze works range from large to freaking huge, with ambitious themes like the alignment of man and beast in sport, and the diminishing "protein resources of the sea", which hopefully doesn't mean Carnival's cancelling their prime-rib buffet. She's particularly fixated on equine contests: "Turn on the Play" has a polo jockey preparing to strike, while the gargantuan "Pick Your Winner" depicts a quartet of jockeys hurdling a gate en route to unseen glory (keep poking around, you'll find that hole). The rest of the work stretches from the elegant "Boleo" (a man and woman dancing in evening wear) to the old-timey "Artesian Well", where a woman pumps water while a man lazily watches (if these were modern times, their marriage would be H2-Over).

Jitkoff also creates stunning watercolors inspired equally by her travels and worldly concerns, a parade of images including Yemeni daggers, flying sea turtles, and Indonesian mantis shrimp -- far tastier than the shrimp currently pissing all over your rose bushes.