Things used to be so much simpler in the world, before the Internet, global-stability-threatening nukes, and that imminently straightforward magazine named Complex. For a guy keeping your walls awesomely simple, pick up some paintings from Sodapop Corleone.
From a dude with Florida roots who keeps his life old-school via things like employing retro photo techniques (Darkrooms? Whaaaa?), Sodapop Corleone is Michael’s brother who got out of the family business and got rich after inventing Jolt a line of awesome-in-their-straightforwardness thing-portraits that recall a simpler time, when men were men, and the diet soft drink Tab was still neat-o. Paintings you’ll have to resist eating include a delicious marbleized filet mignon, a bright pink strawberry frosted donut, a damn fine lookin’ slab of ham entitled "Dig on Swine", and a single White Castle slider, also what they called the old fat dude with the beard when he couldn’t hear them in some other dimension. Other works range from a bright blue sign from Gainesville's old Florida Motel, head-on jobs of a 1980 Chevy Caprice and a Shelby Cobra, Chuck Yeager’s Bell X-1 (the first plane to break the sound barrier, dummy), and an old-ass ice cream truck, which was presumably even faster, due to all the Rocket Pops.
Pop'll also do custom paintings of cars if you provide the make/year/model, which should allow you to get your hands on the simplest thing of all: a Geo Metro.