Styx may have once implored everyone to come sail away, but a new Spanish concern hell-bent on rendering the Panozzo brothers irrelevant is letting you sail away without having to move your lazy butt off the couch: Dvelas, who craft contemporary, weather-resistant furniture using out-of-commission sails. Each piece includes a traceability tag containing info on the boat of origin, and reflects the "poetry of the sea", so you know it's mad deep. A sampling:
Genois: Beanbag-esque, it's stuffed with "filling pearls" that cause its backside to "become tense" when sat on. Mostly because you're naked.
Driza: Made of recovered bronze carabiners and fresh hemp rope, this hand storage unit's rigging system hoists jackets, bags, pants, or "whatever has been hung on it", which the Genois knows can't be you now that you've sat on it pants-less.
B&S Elondo: Sitting on a wooden frame, the sail fabric's wrapped in such a way that it functions as either an upright easy chair or reclined lounger depending on how
fat you are it's placed on the floor.
If you've got your own old sail sitting around you can ship it off and they'll turn it into the piece of your choice, or, alternately, make you an offer, which better not involve you going anywhere, cause it's not like you have too much time on your hands.