Lifestyle

The Lazy Man’s Last-Minute Guide To The Holidays

Well...sh*t.

It's already mid-December, and just a few short days separate you from the biggest gift-giving occasion(s) of the year. And you haven't even begun to think about what to buy your family or how to plan for that party you got roped into hosting. Fear not, because below you'll find the easiest ways to get through the holiday season with maximum festivity and minimal effort.

So kick back, relax, and let someone else do the heavy lifting.

Five-day shipping just won't cut it

Amazon Prime 30 Day Trial - Free
If you don't have Prime yet, now's the time to invoke your God-given right to a 30-day free trial. Score two-day free shipping for all of the gifts you were totally going to order three weeks ago, and be the holiday hero you were born to be.

No time for any shipping?

NYT 12 Week Digital Subscription - $70
Look how thoughtful you are, giving the gift of relevant, timely journalism. Which took you absolutely no time or effort to order, gift wrap, or ship.

Wait in line at the liquor store? Hell no.

Minibar - Free to download
The holidays demand plenty of boozed up soirees, but the lines this time of year stand between you and your precious, precious alcohol. Do yourself a favor and download a liquor delivery app like Minibar, which allows you to order your spirits online and get them dropped off at your door. Plus, they won our Great Booze Delivery App Race.

Obviously, you forgot to chill your beer/wine

Corkcicle - $24.95
So let this nifty device make up for your lack of planning. Keep it in the freezer, and then insert it into wine or beer to cool it down from room temperature to chilly alcoholic bliss in 15 minutes.

Save time with non occasion-specific cards

Charted Greetings and Salutations - $5
Stock up on these clever cards from Pop Chart Labs and never set foot in a Hallmark again. The X and Y axes have occasions and greetings, allowing you to check a box and call it a day. Get a closer look here.

Be your own decoration

Beard Baubles - $11 per pack
A pack of these festive beard ornaments will be enough of a conversation starter that no one will notice your lack of ugly Christmas sweater. Bonus: proceeds from purchase go to fight Melanoma. 

Inflatable wreath? Inflatable wreath.

DCI Wreath - $23.24
The pinnacle of holiday laziness. All of the cheer, none of the rotting pine needles shedding all over your floors.

Don't waste time waiting for the oven

Pigs- In -A-Blanket Appetizer Maker - $199
Holiday snacking is the best, but if you're the one hosting, cut out all of that ghastly time waiting for the oven to pre-heat, and serve up appetizers George Foreman-style with this custom pigs-in-a-blanket maker.

Put your house-guests to work

Baby Mop - $40
Your new nephew? Adorable. You know what else is adorable? Sparkling clean floors that you didn't have to mop yourself, because you got him this human mop onesie for Christmas. Win-win.

 

And finally, top things off the world's laziest Christmas tree

Thomas Kinkade Pop-Up 6 Foot Tree - $199
What you see is pretty much what you get with this one.


Ali Drucker is a staff writer for Supercompressor. Follow her on Twitter and Instagram, where she will be live tweeting her very Jewish Floridian Christmas this year.