The $45m Private Disney Castle In Connecticut

Not that it's news to anyone, but the ultra-rich spend their money differently than you or I: on the cars, the yachts, the cell phones, even the special toilet paper. Then there are the eccentrics, whose choices skew a little, well, strange. Take steel fortune heir Christopher Mark, who dropped a mint to build an over-the-top, Disney-esque castle in the middle of Connecticut, surrounded by a moat, and filled with exotic animals. Natch.

Does that sort of thing get you excited? Well, it's your lucky day, because the place just hit the market (sans exotic animals). This is what the $45 million price tag gets you.

Completed in 2009, the 22,000+ square foot, 20-room, towered stone palace is nestled on around 75 acres in Woodstock, Connecticut, which is home to a little under 8,000 residents, and zero other castles.

Okay, so it's a little gaudy. Give it a few hundred years though and who knows, it may earn the patina of its European brethren*.

*It won't.

Check out that view though! It sits on its own private pond, and given the number of turrets, you'll be able to take it in from all different angles. 

Cutting your castle's yard with a dinky sit down lawn mower? Weak. This is a job for a team of indentured servants landscapers.

Inside, things are...complicated. The decor can only be described as safari-gothic, melding colorful and dark wooden accents with distinctly old world-architectural details (note the shape of the entryway above). Of course, you're free to switch things up as you see fit. Just remember, you're working with some interesting bones. A McMansion this is not.

It's been reported that Mr. Mark attempted to build a business renting the space out for special events and model photoshoots, only to be turned down by the city, as officials had an inkling the operation would easily devolve into something seedier.

Though if you do choose to entertain guests, it appears there's a special nook that functions well as a live music performance area.

Because of the unique multi-tower setup, many of the rooms, including the eight bedrooms, are circular.

Even the kitchen is wild. Anyone else feeling dizzy? 

The dining room could pass for a discarded set from Pirates Of The Caribbean; but hey, when it's yours you can paint over that sky-painted ceiling right quick.

And while there are plenty of design touches that harken back to a simpler time, the bathrooms (of which there are eight and a half) are thankfully exempt. Which is good, because we're pretty sure medieval whirlpools aren't quite the same as the modern ones.

Into it? You can request a private showing here. Just remember, it's BYO exotic animals.

Joe McGauley is a senior editor at Supercompressor. He prefers his castles old and historic.