30. You frequent Kung Fu Saloon
31. You wear driving shoes
If you don’t know what driving shoes are, you are 100% off the hook.
32. You don’t have a sense of humor about lists like this
Come on, this was written by a person wearing pajamas Googling: “what is the current slang for drinking Champagne in the club.”
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Anastacia Uriegas is an Austin writer who has been guilty of at least a dozen of these. Follow her on Twitter at @AnaUire.