You suddenly realize you haven’t patronized the city’s cultural attractions in years
When speaking to out-of-town friends, you boast relentlessly about everything the city has to offer: impressive fine dining, world-class museums. You haven’t actually taken advantage of these things in years, but you’re pretty certain you’ll get tickets to Alinea sometime soon. Like, maybe next year. And you’re 100% POSITIVE you’ll get around to seeing that Marc Chagall exhibit at the Art Institute really, really soon, given that you’re completely unaware the exhibit actually ended months ago.
You accidentally ignore a friend because you’re busy doing “dead eyes”
Whether your preferred method is the 50 yard stare, “dead eyes,” or the “something on my phone is incredibly fascinating!” act, you’ve become an absolute pro at blocking out the people around you. This can become troublesome when the blurry figure in the corner of your eye you’re trying to ignore happens to actually be someone you know. “I PROMISE I wasn’t trying to avoid you, Becky! I seriously thought you were one of those annoying ‘Save the Catfish’ clipboard people trying to block my path! ... Becky? Hello?? Becky?!”
Your apartment hunting priorities have completely changed
When you first moved here, your apartment “must haves” were probably “cool” neighborhood, proximity to bars and friends, and -- if you had extra money to blow -- perhaps amenities like a pool and gym. However, once you’ve gotten that whole Wrigleyville-dwelling phase out of your system, you’ll find yourself with an entirely different set of priorities, like, you know, avoiding trendy neighborhoods in favor of those with a more “neighborhood” feel.