Discovering Dial-A-Bus was a life-changing experience
If you had a few bucks, you could get picked up on your doorstep and dropped off anywhere in town. It’s like the CTA, but for sheltered suburban kids!
A movie released 20+ years ago is likely the most exciting thing that ever happened to your town
So what if The Breakfast Club / Ferris Bueller’s Day Off / Home Alone / Wayne’s World were barely filmed here… they put this town on the map, dammit!
You can not comprehend how your grandparents raised four kids inside of a Chicago bungalow
And you thought sharing 2.5 bathrooms with two siblings was bad? You don’t even want to think about the horrors that occurred inside that two-bedroom, one-bath home.
You take it personally when people refer to every fool in Wrigleyville as “suburbanites”
Um, excuse me - I do believe the inadequate bro who’s trying to punch that cop is wearing a tshirt that says University of Michigan, not Oakton Community College. TRANSPLANTS.
You’ll miss the most random aspects of suburban life once you move to the city
Why doesn’t my local grocery store carry Greek coffee or authentic pierogies? Why are all of the good hot dog stands so far away? Most importantly, why in Ditka’s name has Caputo’s not opened a city location yet?!