You’re not used to walking anywhere
Unless you’re mall-hiking, nothing’s really close to anything else, or your home. Face it, your city planners were all about housing and retail acreage. Walkability and greenspaces? Not so much. While it’s not a ton better in Dallas, we at least have a few walkable portions of popular neighborhoods.
Those one-direction streets in Downtown Dallas terrify you
Oh, we’ve seen you cluelessly trying to hang the wrong right onto Elm St (we were the ones honking). It’s OK if you wonder how average civilians effortlessly remember which streets go which way -- but next time, take Uber.
The rampancy of valets baffles you
The phenomenon of valet service everywhere is definitely spreading northward, but if you’re from the Mid-Cities or the exurbs, you might ponder the necessity of valet at the mall, the coffeehouse, or the corner taco joint.
You work for a major corporation
If your work badge reads Dell, Frito-Lay, or HP, chances are you live a stone’s throw from your company’s gigantic suburban digs. Can’t blame you -- who needs that commute?
You drink (and enjoy) crappy beer
This one’s a sad one, because really great microbreweries are choosing to root themselves in the suburbs of late, so there’s really no excuse to sip bad suds. But we’ve heard time and again from some damn good restaurateurs that they can’t fathom opening an outpost in the suburbs without offering bottles of... er, cans of... well, you know the ones. (Note: this does not apply to non-hipster/unironic drinkers of the stuff.)