Fact: though you constantly feign annoyance at “having to run” to the Galleria, the only thing you actually hate is trying to park there. The rest, from spending entirely too much money on rubber boat shoes to the food court circling and sampling game, is pure glory. Hell, you may even ice skate one day, but definitely not today because your feet are tired and you think you’ve earned yourself a beer.
Complaining about changing neighborhoods to anyone within ear shot
Yet still chatting up the hot, gluten-free barista at the 100% local, raw, organic, and sustainable juice bar down the street that you frequent post-workout. We get it, you’ve lived here forever and have sworn an oath to “Keep Montrose Weird,” but you sort of like the new shops and bars popping up around the ‘hood. Minus the Mattress Firms. Nobody likes those.