So our greatest contribution to the American culinary collective is… a ham and cheese sandwich. Oh, but it has pickles, mustard AND mayo?! Well, nevermind then!
Driving like assholes
Because when you pick your friends up at the airport and they start holding on to their armrests for dear life as you cut off 16 cab drivers and move over five lanes without signaling, all you tell them is, “This is how we do in Miami, bro.”
Miami might be the only city in the world where it’s perfectly acceptable for dudes to post ab selfies somewhere other than Grindr. Thankfully we’re building so many glass towers that we’ll never run out of reflective surfaces.
Ya tu sabe.
If the bass isn't rattling the trunk, does it even count as music?
Running on "Miami time"
Being perpetually late isn’t a cute little personality quirk. It’s rude and disrespectful. And nobody’s believing you didn’t think there’d be traffic. YOU KNEW THERE'D BE TRAFFIC.
Other people's money
If someone is posting pictures of a $500,000 car or a $5 million dollar yacht, there is a 500% chance it’s not theirs. #tagthesponsor