12. Six geese a laying
What the hell are the geese “a laying”? Are they dropping massive turds all over the place? Are they “laying” other geese, in adult terms? No matter, I don’t need a six-pack of geese shitting or having sex all over my apartment. And if they are laying eggs, so what? I’ve never seen goose eggs on any menu. Plus one time when I was 7, a goose spit at me and my OshKosh B'gosh™ overalls. This is a worthless, mean-spirited present.
11. A partridge in a pear tree
I live in Manhattan. I can in no way facilitate a pear tree in my apartment, and a free-range partridge would almost certainly void my safety deposit. The guy's heart is in the right place here, but it’s just not feasible and would severely complicate my life. Plus pears are just bullshit apples, anyway.