The Grill Guard
An orchestra can’t play without a maestro, and your barbecue won’t go on without the grill master. Usually seen sporting an apron with a distasteful pun about “tasting his meat,” the grill guard will take great offense if you complain about your burger’s temperature, or try to take his spatula.
The Backseat Griller
“Hey, don’t you think that one is ready to flip?”
Lets you know in advance they want soy pups and black bean burgers -- or even better, brings them.
Doesn’t let you know they have dietary considerations until it’s too late, but hey -- what a great time to lecture you on the indignities of commercial meat!
The One Who Wears the Pants
The minute the sun hit denim you immediately regretted this decision. Your thighs are starting to sweat (or cry, maybe?) because they are trapped inside a dark, unyielding cage of fabric.
The Sunshine Snoozer
There’s nothing more comforting than the feeling of sunshine on your face and three hotdogs in your stomach. So, by all means, curl up in the hammock or shut your eyes in that lawn chair. We’ll gently wake you before you get sunburn, promise.
The Barbecue Snob
This guy watched that one episode of Mind of Chef where Sean Brock and Rodney Scott whip up mouth-watering Charleston barbecue, and will spend the day pontificating about gas vs. wood grills or how there isn’t enough salt in the rub. Please, just eat your burger.
The Interloper in a Game of Cornhole
Not our fault if you get hit in the head with the bag.
The (Too) Competitive Cornhole Champ
This guy read up on our pro Cornhole tips and is lighting up the backyard board. But did he really have to make your nephew cry? Not cool.