Not cleaning up after your dog
If your dog had opposable thumbs, you could count on it to pick up its own poop (probably more reliably than its owner). Hell, maybe it’d even use a toilet. But since it can’t, that’s on you. And when it has accidents in the building, the super or someone on his team’s gotta clean it up. They’ll even happily do it if you admit to the accident instead of being a little bitch (that’s your dog’s job) and running away from the problem.
Lying about emergencies
It’s not an emergency if your sink’s leaky, or if you’re out of beer. OK, the beer thing is an emergency, but your super can’t fix that regardless. But if your heat goes out? That qualifies. “We prioritize [jobs] in my building,” Grech says. “If your drain is draining slowly, or not at all, it’s not going to be high on the list.”
Not getting that some problems are out of their hands
The super can’t fix everything, especially when you’re out of IPAs. We've been over this! But it’s also out of their control if a contractor is supposed to come and fix something in your place, and then they don’t show up. Screaming at the super for something that isn’t their fault is misplacing your energy. Energy that can be spent getting more beer, or cleaning up after your dog.
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Lee Breslouer is a senior writer for Thrillist, and thinks supers are super... b. Follow him to horrible wordplay: @LeeBreslouer.