Land O’ Lakes, Florida
If you want access to the 8,400sqft lagoon pool complete with grotto waterfall -- where everyone definitely looks like a Playboy bunny -- you have two options: 1) pay for a daily pass, or 2) commit to a hefty annual membership fee and then visit frequently to be sure you get your money’s worth.
Desert Hot Springs, California
The climate is practically perfect year-round, and myriad activities -- horseback riding, art galleries, hiking -- are just a quick drive away (use your best judgement for when and where to make clothing optional). Back on site, the lavish pools are open 24 hours a day and evenings are often marked by sex-charged DJ dancing. When you’re ready to back to wherever it is you came from, have the concierge order you a casual limo or a private jet.
Sign up here for our daily Thrillist email, and get your fix of the best in food/drink/fun.
Ashley Branch is an assistant editor at Thrillist and wants a taco-themed fantasy room. Follow her on Twitter: @AshleyBranch_14.