Q: “What type of music do you listen to?”
A: “I listen to everything! Pop music, which is great because every song has 100 people working on it, and also electronic dance music which is great because you can take selfies and hang out with Molly, who is so much fun. Oh and also, I'm really into Drake.”
Q: “Who is Drake?”
A: “Drake is a Canadian who’s known for his dance moves.”
Q: “Where do you get your music?”
A: “Music-streaming websites, mostly. They're like record stores on your computer but you don’t have to pay anything so long as you don't mind listening to a Febreze ad every other song. But sometimes I do buy vinyl records from Urban Outfitters. Do you still have any of your old ones? I will spend an hour with you sometime in the next few weeks if I can have them.”
Q: “What ever happened to that nice girl you brought to Thanksgiving two years ago?”
A: “She moved to Thailand to become a certified scuba instructor, and then de-friended me on Facebook.”
Q: “When are you going to have kids?”
A: “Do you want to see some photos of my cat?”
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Dan Gentile is a staff writer at Thrillist. His parents are pretty with-it and recently began using his Netflix password, but he sincerely hopes they aren’t chilling while they watch it. Follow him to gross gross gross: @Dannosphere.