Sleeping with your friend’s sister (or sister’s friend)
Because many guys in their 20s are still naive enough to think they can control who other people sleep with, you feel a little pang of guilt when your boy starts going on a rant about what he’d do to any dude who hooks up with his sister. But you’re definitely smirking on the inside.
Your dead-end job
Mark Zuckerberg was already a multi-billionaire by this age. You’ve now spent three years as an assistant account executive living just above the poverty line. You definitely need to be working harder.
Not saving money
Despite that poverty-line salary and $1,000-a-month rent, financial advice columns are still berating you for being a “selfish, near-sighted millennial.” Because, ya know, that $.32 left in your bank account at the end of the month could definitely add up.
Not calling a girl back
Sometimes, convincing a woman you're into her involves, maybe, giving her the impression that you’ll call again. And although you’ll never admit it, you feel like shit when you read that “Thank you for the life lesson :(” text.
Those last few shots you took last night
You don’t feel guilty because your head is pounding and you just threw up. You feel guilty because you paid for them.
Paying bills late
The $10,000 you racked up in credit-card debt, student loans, and phone and cable bills are about a week from being sent to collections. But damn if last night wasn’t fun.
Not keeping in touch with friends and family
You moved away, and it takes work to maintain those relationships. And when you work all week and sleep 'til noon on the weekends, this becomes as high a priority as your mounting credit-card bills.