Own

Shortomatic

Sure, everyone at the beach has on board shorts, but do they have on board shorts featuring a hilarious picture of your uncle passed out in a Wendy's restroom? They could, if they stole your camera, then made them at Shortomatic

Shortomatic's a just-launched, locally-based, fully-custom board-shortery, from a LA-via-London couple who also run a business selling custom yoga mats, so really, it's great to see them finally get down to business. Making your own shorts is seriously simple: first, choose your waistsize, then, upload any jpg you'd like as a print; the site'll automatically resize it, and show you a mock-up pair with layout options, which include resizing/moving the image, making the pic wraparound, full-short, or one leg only, changing the background and lace colors, and even putting a customized text tag around the waist of up to 140 characters, though Mo'Nique's pair has the entire Illiad! If customizing's not your thing, you can also buy unique/limited edition shorts designed by other people ranging from amateurs to actual artists commissioned by the site; all the shorts are made from an ultra-high qual, water-resistant polyester microfiber called "Super Suede", which usually just goes about its business as a mild-mannered leather, unless there's been trouble at a disco.

If you really dig your design, the site's got an affiliate program that allows you to make a commission by selling it to other users, but limits the number printed to 200, much to the chagrin/relief of your uncle.