Sure, Extreme Makeover: Home Edition may change the lives of a handful of down-on-their-luck families, but what about those people who don't even own homes, because they spend all their money at lounges? Well now they can get their swerve on at CV, opening Tuesday

From a cabal of nightlife assassins whose resumes include The Eldridge and Upstairs, CV's imbued the former 105 Riv space with a mod/'70s vibe thanks to vintage-print dark brown wallpaper, hand-crafted retro hanging wooden sculptures, ground-lit flower boxes filled with crystals, and a disco ball -- amazingly pimp'd in a matter of weeks in part to practice for a future reality show about rapidly building nightlife spots (Pimp My Hyde?). Black leather swaddles the room-lining banquettes and the U-shaped bar, which'll be manned by a duo of sexy blondes from Suede, and's padded at the edges for comfier leaning/lurking; for more ogling, a soon-to-be-keypadded door leads to a tiny VIP room that'll screen vintage smut and celebrity sex tapes, so you can fulfill your dream of partying with...Fred Durst! The bottle list is augmented by envy-inducing magnums of Patron Silver and Grey Goose, but the standout's an almost-20-strong selection of Champ, including four kinds each of Veuve, Perrier Jouet, and Dom, plus Cristal, Krug, and Ace of Spades, which should probably earn you some Motorhead

A specialty cocktail list is in the works, and the THOR kitchen'll be classing up bar bites like chicken skewers and sliders, sure to cast your stomach in the all-too-real Extreme Makeover: PWN Edition.