Life's all about second chances: Ollie North broke several important laws, but now he's on TV, and your first cigarette made you throw up, but...look at you now! Giving a second chance to dubious German flying machines, Airship Ventures' Zeppelin.
Because you wanted it, South Bay startup AV's commissioned the Germans to build a real-live recreational Zeppelin -- one of three in the world, it'll be the first such airship to fly over US soil since the tough-act-to-follow Hindenburg (it totally killed). At 246ft, this Zep's smaller than its predecessor (but bigger than a 747), and incorporates 70 years of tech advancements, most importantly its "semi-rigid" hull's filled with helium instead of explode-y hydrogen; the thing flies at around 1300 feet and averages 35mph -- if you want to go faster, rent a glider. Planned 1-2hr tours include the Oakland/SF skyline, South Bay to SF Bay, and the Russian River Valley/Alexander Valley wine country; you'll be hanging in a spacious and comfy, love-seat-equipped under-cabin with room for 12 plus pilot/flight attendant, flanked by a big-window-having bathroom (oh, the poo-manity).
Flights begin at the end of this month, but AV's taking reservations now. If your group's large enough, it could qualify you for a discount -- money you can put towards cigarettes, which despite testing your loyalty by costing a lot/slowly murdering you, you are still not contra.
Timothy DeLaGhetto and David So Devour all the Bacon at the Blue Ribbon Bacon Festival