Design your own guitar, solo

Because Guitar Center has officially banned you for consistent and earsplitting '80s metal solos on axes you never buy, design your own instead with Wallpusher Guitars, an Ipswich farm-based husband/wife duo who craft electric guitars to your specs from reclaimed materials that "take on personality with wear", meaning they must dress them in sweet No Fear shirts or something. Their open-ended website allows you to design a guitar with:

* Over 50 different pre-carved bodies (suck it, John Basedow)

* Bolt-on neck styles with a choice of headstocks, fretboards, and scale lengths for hitting the ultra-rare G sharp sharp

* Woods collected from old furniture, shipping pallets, and even felled trees, which will now definitely make a sound

* Unspeakable options on ergonomic electrical controls, bridges, tuners, and pickups

* Clever extras (patents pending, don't even think about it!) like an integrated thumb rest cast into the body, and for more comfort when going strapless, a carved "Leg Hook" -- just don't try that ish on Chuck Liddell

And to keep your new axe from walking away, WPG also peddles a crazy diverse selection of fast-adjusting reclaimed leather guitar straps that're hand sewn, -stamped, and -riveted, almost as much as the Guitar Center salesmen watching your latest brain-melting arpeggios.