These days, fests like Glasto and Virgin have become enormously crowded affairs, though on the plus side, there's no chance of finding a virgin at Glasto. For a smaller-scale bacchanal, hit this July's four-day Nova Festival, where no more than 5k revelers will descend upon a lush West Sussex estate secured by a pair who helped on The Big Chill, as if our weather needed assistance. What to expect:
A Sonic Assault: The main stage & five smaller venues will play host to 50+ acts including Chris Coco, Speech Debelle, Stumblin' Slims, Fionn Regan, Ghostpoet, Norman Jay, The Joker & The Thief, and Aidan Larkin's The Big 10 Inch, either a reference to a record, or to a near-record.
A Stomach Assault: Stumble into Bompas & Parr's Super Nova Cocktail Bar, the Nova Arms popup pub, and The Chap's hookah-piping Kubla Khan’s Coffeehouse; take a seat at The Disappearing Dining Club's family-style long tables; or bard-out at the Hurly Burly Dining Theatre (completely solar powered, so continue to enjoy the dark cold).
A Bunch of Random Stuff... Assault: You'll find Swedish-style hot tubs, the country's first "bespoke fine art mini golf course" (each hole's designed by a different artist, such as David Shrigley), "stripping and teasing" lessons (technically ladies-only), masseuse-filled "soul pods", a popup casino w/ betting from just 10p, films, and comedy from likes of The Beta Males and Late Night Gimp Fight -- or, the preferred activity of the very few who don't get laid at Glasto.