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ManCation Nation

Successful vacation packages are all about perfect pairings, like biking and wine tasting, or...wakeboarding and Uzis. That's right: pop off a 180 then pop off some rounds, at ManCation Nation.

Nestled on the banks of Arizona's Colorado River, MN's a picturesque compound catering to dudes with the triple-whammy of bachelory accommodations, endless grub, and potentially life-threatening water & gun activities, a combo they claim encourages "ideas for the betterment of mankind", which seems plausible so long we're headed towards a Waterworld. Avail for groups up to 10, visitors get schooled in two distinct classes: Extreme Water Sports, where a former stunt man will teach you how to flip, twirl, spin, and painfully crash wakeboard-style, and Technical Weapon Experience, in which a lifelong law-enforcement agent'll learn you everything from close-up handgun techniques to landing a 50 cal sniper shot at 1000ft before throwing you into an explosives-laden mock shooting scenario, which won't be nearly as mocked as the fear-based explosion it could precipitate. Back at base camp, the riverside "Mancave" has been pimped with two sports-only plasmas, a poker table, indoor/outdoor bars, a recliner-filled home theater, and three waterfront decks; your personal chef'll coordinate a custom menu filled with grass-fed Texas beef, organic poultry, seafood options like hand-rolled sole fillets stuffed with scallops and crab, and 24-hour apps to ensure you "won't go to bed hungry" (though who can sleep -- there's apps!).

Should shooting stuff & shredding the gnar get boring, other local activities include fishing & biplane rides at Lake Havasu, golfing at Emerald Canyon, and a trip to a bar in the middle of the desert, which is built on the most natural pairing of all: boozing and having no idea where you are.

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