Wine is a versatile substance: it can be the 12th ingredient in garbage can punch, or a means to impress your boss, your girlfriend, or your boss' girlfriend. To learn more about wine's loftier possibilities -- and get drunk for almost nothing on a Saturday afternoon -- you should take advantage of our very unofficial urban wine tasting tour:
179 Columbus, at 68th
Free tasting from 4-7pm. This Saturday features wines from Uruguay -- "the new Paraguay".
- 5pm: 222 Amsterdam Ave, at 70thFree Australian wine tasting from 5-8pm.
- 5:15pm: 502 Amsterdam, between 84th and 85thRefuel at this laid back, authentic Italian restaurant offering the ultimate cheese plate (10 cheeses, $20). The synergy between wine and cheese should take your feigned refinement to a whole new level.
- 6:15pm: 2492 Broadway, at 93rd$5 to taste 5. $1 extra for wine over $20 a bottle, but a $2 refund for taking proprietor's freakish hairless son out for ice cream.
- 6:45pm: 730 Columbus, at 96thFree Italian White tasting from 4-7pm. Unsanctioned James Caan book signing in the scotch section to follow.
- 7:15pm: 2781 Broadway, at 107thFree flowing California chardonnay and pinot noir from 5-8pm. Simultaneous rum tasting, if you're ready for the hard stuff.
To avoid being pressured into actually purchasing an expensive vintage, it's best to come armed with a few excuses. For instance: "I'm underage", or the obvious, "Uruguayans killed my family." Instead, since you're uptown anyway, go purchase a cut-rate box of wine, and use it to ply unrefined Columbia undergrads into sleeping with you.