Food & Drink

This Exists: Piña Colada Cheddar Cheese

In a move that is baffling drinkers and cheese-lovers alike, Germany-based discount supermarket Aldi is selling cheddar cheese in two booze-inspired flavors: Piña Colada and Tequila Lime. We love cheese and we really love both of those drinks, but in one bite?

The Piña Colada cheddar is “infused with natural and artificial coconut and pineapple flavor” and the Tequila Lime has “robust undertones of tequila and natural lime flavor.” But don’t get too excited, neither cheese contains actual alcohol.

These curdy curiosities are the latest offering from Happy Farms, the store’s dairy brand. As Grub Street points out, Happy Farms has recently been in hot water for not being a real farm. That bit of intel actually helps make sense of things. Because if this cheese was coming from a farm—rather than a factory or lab—we’d have to wonder what they were feeding their cows. After all, the most efficient way to get tequila-flavored milk to make tequila-flavored cheese would presumably be to instate a bovine happy hour.

The cheeses were apparently expected to go quickly, prompting the chain to encourage customers to take advantage of this “special buy.”

While Aldi’s latest move isn’t a total gimmick (a quick search for “Piña Colada cheese” brings up a couple of recipes, suggesting these are flavors people want in their mouths), it’s still a highly questionable snack choice. To paraphrase Ron Burgundy, milk (with tequila or rum, in this case) was a bad choice.