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Someone Microwaved a Urine Sample at 7-Eleven and Of Course It Exploded

The communal microwave at your local 7-Eleven is one of the most beloved and disgusting amenities of the convenience store chain. It just so happens that when a patron uses that microwave to heat a urine sample encased in a hand warmer, things can get messy and explosive.

Police in Beaverton, Oregon evacuated a 7-Eleven when someone did exactly that, causing a blast on Tuesday, according to a report by local news station KATU. Upon inspection, police were surprised not to find some kind of nefarious chemical agent or explosive device in the appliance, but instead a putrid urine sample. This was serious though, as the Portland Police's explosives unit was summoned to clear the scene. 

Beaverton Police note that the suspect was most likely en route to a drug test, and thought the microwave at 7-Eleven might suffice as a decent means of heating the sample, which was probably too cold to seem legit at the time. The scheme was ultimately foiled because the urine sample was kept in a hand warmer, which is teeming with substances -- such as iron powder -- that do not react favorably with microwave radiation.

"It appears that whoever was on his/her way to do a drug test did not feel that it was warm enough, so they decided to microwave it at 7-Eleven," Beaverton Police spokesperson Mike Rowe said in a release. "The chemical makeup of the hand warmer did not agree with the microwave and exploded."

Use of recreational marijuana is legal in Oregon, but some employers still perform routine drug tests. Whether this doofus was stoned out of their mind, performing a favor for a friend, or in the throes of something far more severe, remains to be seen. The suspect is still at large, ostensibly roaming the local area for clean urine, while the poor microwave will likely be thrown in the garbage.

[h/t KATU]

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Sam Blum is a News Staff Writer for Thrillist. He's also a martial arts and music nerd who appreciates a fine sandwich and cute dogs. Find his clips in The Guardian, Rolling Stone, The A.V. Club and Vice. He's on Twitter @Blumnessmonster.