Plenty of jokes have been spilled by half-assed comedians about McDonald's near-molten coffee; the 1990s lawsuit gave Jay Leno at least seven chuckles-worth of laughs. That's pretty good for him.
But when it comes to McDonald's products and ACTUAL molten liquids, well, what happens when they collide doesn't result in a lawsuit -- just entertainment.
Uploaded to YouTube by user Tito4re, a video showing molten lead being poured over top of the all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles and onions on a sesame seed bun results in something more greatly resembling the results of Jeb Bush's presidential bid. As in, a total flameout. Sick burn, I know!
Jokes aside, the video's details explain that copper's melting point is 1,984°F, or 1,085°C -- only slightly hotter than working the fry station in August. But as the molten metal sears and chars each layer of the burger, it eventually pools around the burger's original resting place, leaving behind a carcinogenic pile of former food and a donut-shaped copper ring. It's weirdly cathartic to watch. But it definitely doesn't taste as good.
Watch the whole video for yourself. And remember: don't try this at home. Or in your local Playplace.
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Ryan Craggs is Thrillist's Senior News Editor. He feels like this entire video was a waste of good copper. And a good Big Mac. Follow him @ryanrcraggs.