FDA Warns Consumers of ‘Dangerous' Boner Coffee

Along with providing the caffeine kickstart you need to function every day, drinking coffee has long been associated with several cool health benefits. But believe it or not, there's actually such thing as coffee that promises to not just perk you up (energy-wise), but get you up (penis-wise), too. And now, the Food & Drug Administration is warning it could pose a serious health risk. 

That's right, folks: there's actually such thing as boner coffee, and federal health officials said it could be dangerous. A recent public advisory from the FDA warns against buying or using what's not-so-subtly called Stiff Bull Herbal Coffee after a lab analysis found that it secretly contains a substance similar to the active ingredient in Viagra, according to a report by UPI. 

This shouldn't come as much of a surprise, considering Stiff Bull's website asks, "Would you like to stay harder longer?" in all caps. As you can see in the FDA's photos, the coffee's packaging claims it's "The Relationship Saver" and boosts energy before "major activities," but apparently doesn't list the Viagra-like ingredient in question. Instead, Stiff Bull boasts an allegedly all-natural blend of herbs like "Tongkat Ali, Maca Root, and Guarana."

Specifically, the FDA said the coffee contains desmethyl carbodenafil, which is structurally similar sildenafil, the active ingredient used the FDA-approved boner pill, Viagra. Consuming desmethyl carbodenafil, which has been found in dozens of those shady male enhancement supplements, could pose a serious health risk for some men, according the health agency. 

"This undeclared ingredient may interact with nitrates found in some prescription drugs such as nitroglycerin and may lower blood pressure to dangerous levels," the FDA states in the advisory. "Men with diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, or heart disease often take nitrates."

Basically, if you're looking for a caffeine boost, stick with slurping mugs full of your normal joe; and similarly, if you're looking for a boner boost, stick with FDA-approved drugs. As always, folks, practice safe coffee -- use a condiment (like milk). 

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Tony Merevick is Cities News Editor at Thrillist and is still trying to come up with a funny morning wood joke. Send news tips to news@thrillist.com and follow him on Twitter @tonymerevick.