This Cheese Event Was Basically Britain's Fyre Festival and Twitter Is Furious
On Saturday, the Giant Cheeseboard happened in London -- or more accurately, happened to London. It was supposed to be a grand affair of mulled wine and good cheese. In practice, it pissed a bunch of people off, is being compared to Fyre Festival, and might undermine your faith in civilization.
Tickets were £30 (roughly $40) for six hours of unlimited cheese and mulled wine. The event, however, promptly ran out of cheese, and wine was limited to two glasses per person. Folks were not pleased.
“The cheese was really poor. The mulled wine was cold and weak,” a customer told the Evening Standard. “Things that were on your event map weren’t even present.” Another attendee told the publication that they'd never seen "so many unhappy people" at an event.
The most damning criticism, however, came from Twitter under the hashtag #GiantCheeseboard. Here's a brief, hilarious, infuriating overview:
The announcement promised "fun."
Fun was not delivered.
The first sign of trouble was the huge line outside.
The nightclub was a bizarre venue for a cheese festival.
The wine and cheese had some detractors -- actually pretty much exclusively detractors.
This is probably the best example of the rage attendees were experiencing over their would-be quaint Saturday.
The only thing giant about this cheese board was that it was a total giant waste of time. 5 different types of cheese are you fucking kidding me, no giant camembert, ran out of bread, chorizo, crackers, grapes, cold mulled wine, 90 minute wait to get in #giantcheeseboard— Kevin Chun (@peanutter571) December 16, 2017
Some might take comfort in the fact that English got a new idiom from this experience.
Others saw it as an opportunity to illustrate the difference between our two nations.