Donuts aren't usually allowed on a diet. Trust me, I've asked. But according to United Kingdom-based bakery Greggs, that isn't always the case. Earlier this week, CEO Roger Whiteside announced -- at a childhood obesity conference, no less -- that the chain is placing an increased focus on "diet" friendly donuts.
And while you're likely thinking, what kind of bullshit kale-flavored baked goods are they about to push, just wait. That's actually not the schtick. The health-conscious donuts Greggs speaks of? They're just... regular donuts.
The chain is placing cleaner eating habits at the "top of its corporate social responsibility agenda" by encouraging customers to eat ring-shaped donuts instead of round, jelly-filled ones. This is, somehow, a totally serious approach.
"People like big cakes, not little cakes... We know that we shouldn’t be encouraging people to eat large cakes... But the problem is you have to go with demand," Whiteside said at the London event. "The ring donuts are between 200 and 300 calories, the ball doughnuts are between 300 and 400."
While, technically, this tracks, it also isn't some wild revelation. It's like saying a small pizza is "healthy" because it has less calories than the large. Sorry to say it doesn't automatically translate. We can't go around cutting holes in a cheeseburger and calling ourselves clean-eating influencers.
"All you little health warriors go, I'm going to have a McVegan burger for breakfast and a Greggs doughnut with a hole in it and I'm going to lose loads of weight and be healthy," Good Morning Britain host Piers Morgan chimed in. "No, you're going to get really fat and bring your death a little bit closer."
h/t The Takeout